Again and again I come across in my work, client’s saying that that they lack confidence or need to build their confidence. Is this you too?

I can certainly think of many examples over the years of lacking confidence, whilst growing up, before doing a presentation, or working with a group of people, or going for an interview or returning to work after maternity leave. The list is endless! However, I also know that at times I have also felt confident doing all of those things. So how does that work? How can I feel confident and lack confidence when doing any one of those things?

Could it be that I was older and wiser so felt more confident, could it be that someone encouraged me before I did it or could it be that it’s all part of being human? It’s the latter!

That’s what I’ve come to see more and more clearly over the years and would like to share with you as once you get a glimpse of it working that way it’ll lead to a feeling of freedom and endless possibilities. It is totally natural that our confidence goes up and down, it’s how we operate, which is OK. What is helpful is in understanding how.

I ask you to be open to the idea that maybe our feeling of confidence or lack of is thought created. To give an example as soon as I start to say to myself, ‘I am not feeling confident’ it seems like that is the truth about myself, that this is the way I am and then as a result I feel a lack of confidence which limits what I can then do. Most of the time we are caught up in our thinking but we don’t’ see this.

I encourage you to start to be curious about looking in the direction of thought, not WHAT you are thinking but THAT you think. Once you start to see that you live so much time in your thinking you can become more aware of your thoughts and that they create your experience, be that high confidence or a lack of confidence. Seeing thought for what it is, seeing confidence for what it is will result in less time caught up in your thinking and more space for possibilities.